I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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