How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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