Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
