Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
