I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
