last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
The beer is more important than you right now.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
