Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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