That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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