it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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