I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
and you fell through a lawn chair
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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