guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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