You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize