Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
i think i just lost a toe
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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