You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
