You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
