He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Randomize