why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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