But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
