Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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