PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
