can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
