Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize