I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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