For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Randomize
