I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
