it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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