I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
