Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Can I color on your dick again?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
