please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
