Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
