My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Randomize
