Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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