I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
