Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
