How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
