Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
