I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
