handjob tips. give me some.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
