there was a trapeze. enough said
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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