Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
