textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
