Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Don't make out with my wife yet
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
PANTIES FOUND
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