Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
