Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
