so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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