But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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