I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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