I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
