What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
