i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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